maupuia calling

It was most noticeable eating dinner tonight. No loud background noise from the corner of the living room. We could all hear each other talk. And we actually did talk.

We took the tv away today. It’s sitting down here in my office, on the floor, unplugged, gray, lifeless and dull.

It’s not that I really object on a moral or philosophical level to tv. And in fact it’s going to be hard for me not being able to watch basketball and the odd programme I like. But we’d reached a stage where it was on all day. The kids would turn it on first thing in the morning, Josh sitting cross-legged on the floor entranced, and Matt slumped on the couch, barking at us to get him breakfast. Supposedly we had a policy of no tv during dinner. Too many tired, stressed nights put paid to that.

Ultimately, we used the tv as a babysitter. Allowing us a few moments - although, often, it would be much longer - of peace. A few moments of the kids not making demands on us. But it really was a cheap fix. It created more problems than it ever could solve.

The kids have progressvely been getting more angry and irritable. More passive. More insistent on tv’s privileged place in the order of their lives. A vicious cycle where that attitude manifested itself in increased bad behaviour towards each other and towards us, leading us to use tv more and more as a pacifier.

So I decided yesterday morning, after a particularly stressful time getting Matthew out the door and off to school, that just maybe not having tv would help. And today it’s gone.

I sold it to Matt that without tv we’d be able to spend more time with him and Josh. Being without a tv is going to be hardest on Deb and I. It’s no longer going to be there as an easy way to occupy the kids. Still, I have a suspicion that the problems of our tv-free-zone are going to be nicer problems than the ones we’ve been worrying about of late.

I think Kathy would be pleased though!