maupuia calling

So I vacilate. Between wanting to blaze with fire and passion and actually make all these ideas I have happen, and sitting here, or there, struck mute and motionless and overwhelmed by all I have to do. Sitting here playing, of all things, online poker.

It is, of course, an ongoing thing. Something just above mediocrity snatched from the jaws of achievement.

I don’t know why. Afraid to succeed sound just too trite, but there’s an element of that. Don’t just do something, cos it has to be, you know, really really good, and it’s never really really good in the act of starting. I mean how could it be - it’s just a start.

Also, and this post is a prime example, an inability to actually concentrate on a single thing. It’s a post-modern, web-enabled and 2.0 thing. A not entirely welcome mash-up of distractions, siren-calling to me with the promise of something just a little more appealing than what I’m currently doing.

Occasionally though, something so godamm beautiful distracts you that it knocks mere earth-bound concerns from your mind.

And leaves you, eventually, able to finish at least this. And leaves you with the sense of someone so full and bursting - words, music, trumpets and static, tumbling and pushing and overunning each other - with whatever it is they can’t keep inside any longer. And leaves you with the sense of possibilities able to be rendered full and alive.

This entry was posted on Monday, November 6th, 2006 at 9:31 pm and is filed under music. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.